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Umeda Hokuto ([personal profile] playingdoctor) wrote2007-09-30 08:05 pm
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[IC post-trauma post]

[....from Umeda's office, where the door is closed for once, comes the sound of Blade Runner.]


((OOC: Everyone and their mother, including Akiha and Io, have dropped in this last little while; Umeda's indulging in his comfort movie. *g* Anyone can feel free to jump this post to catch the movie with him or harass him after it to cheer him up; this post isn't for anyone specific -- I just didn't think I could manage a main-comm post that might hit a few thousand again, but anyone's still free to come and bug Umeda. Got an appointment? Meant to return something to him? Heard about the drops? Come by and say hi.))
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playingdoctor: (sad.)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 04:10 am (UTC)(link)
Nah, stick around.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
[hesitates]

. . . nah, I. Just wanted to come let you know—I mean . . .

What happened?
playingdoctor: (GEH)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Let me know...?

Geh, on my side, nothing much! Just a couple of idiots decided to cut and run. About time! I was sick of seeing their faces around all the time anyway. Now I don't need to worry. That damn woman's not gonna show up to torture me anytime. And I can finally sleep at night without weirdo Akiha climbing in my window.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 04:39 am (UTC)(link)
[silent for a long moment]

Akiha and Io, hey? . . . sorry.
playingdoctor: (sad.)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 04:42 am (UTC)(link)
And Roy and one of my students and probably others I haven't found out about, but...mostly Io and Akiha, yeah. Back home for them.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 04:46 am (UTC)(link)
[turns to face the window, slouching backwards]

It's that time of the year, right? . . . Roxas, too. I mean, not home, but. Gone.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 05:08 am (UTC)(link)
[shrugs, still facing away, shoulders tense and hunched]

He merged back into Sora. Like Namine did. Like he did last fall. Only this time, he said it was gonna be longer. It was gonna be for a long time. So—

[voice hitches]

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 05:19 am (UTC)(link)
[shakes his head, hard]

But he says he'll—he'll come back, so I just. I gotta trust that an' . . . wait, an' just—
playingdoctor: (sad.)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 05:22 am (UTC)(link)
[leans over and touches a couple of fingers to Axel's back]

It's not an end. It's a wait.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 05:31 am (UTC)(link)
I hope so. I . . . f-fuck, I'm tired of hopin', I hate havin' my happiness always taken away from me when I let my guard down, dammit—

[lets himself sink down onto the edge of Umeda's bed, dropping his elbows to his knees and bowing his head, shoulders shuddering]
playingdoctor: (numb <s>and in love</s>)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 05:34 am (UTC)(link)
[quiet]

You know, I don't think Roxas could do that if he didn't get to a point where he understood how much you loved him, and how much he can trust you. He's grown a lot, you know? Because he knows he can rest up and you'll still be here when he comes back. He's not scared of losing you any more. Doing this is practically proof that it's not over.

[rubs his back gently]

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 05:46 am (UTC)(link)
Still don't make it easier, an' it—ain't easy t'convince myself that somethin' ain't gonna go wrong, that I ain't gonna end up dead, or that he's not gonna lose his memories again, or—t-tch.
playingdoctor: (sad.)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 05:51 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah. It's scary, huh? So you're gonna have to try to live. That's the part you can control.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 05:53 am (UTC)(link)
I'm tired.

I'm so damn tired, but I don't got anyplace to run to, like him. I ain't lucky enough to have a heart, so I just gotta keep holdin' myself together, but hell, I'm so. tired.
playingdoctor: (Serious. Sexy. Possibly needs a smoke.)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 05:55 am (UTC)(link)
I know. But if you stop here, you'll be guaranteeing that you're not gonna be ending up together.

Just take one day at a time.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 06:00 am (UTC)(link)
[drags his hands over his face]
playingdoctor: (ice queen)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 06:05 am (UTC)(link)
[rests a hand on the back of Axel's neck]

Every day, I want you to wake up and decide to live for that day.

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 06:38 am (UTC)(link)
[silent for a long moment]

. . .

You think I haven't had to do that pretty much my entire fuckin' life already?
playingdoctor: (...)

[personal profile] playingdoctor 2007-10-01 06:44 am (UTC)(link)
[shrugs] Then you're good at it.

[touches the back of Axel's head]

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 06:54 am (UTC)(link)
[slowly lifts his head, leaning a little into Umeda's touch]

. . .

[identity profile] the-ex-flame.livejournal.com 2007-10-01 07:20 am (UTC)(link)
. . .

Can I stay here tonight?

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