Umeda Hokuto (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
playingdoctor) wrote2005-11-25 05:54 pm
playingdoctor) wrote2005-11-25 05:54 pm
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So, I kicked ass or SOMETHING on my presentation (probably something) and am sitting here with a deluxe steamed bun (HAY THERE'S AN EGG IN THIS THING) and decided to take the time to write up Umeda's relationships.
Yanno, I rambled about this before, and will again (I am partly through rereading and keeping a compiled list of every single person Umeda is in some kind of sexual/romantic relationship with but that'll be a while before it's done. Uh.) but Umeda is into casual sex. This is mainly because the guy he's in love with, well, doesn't really like him back. Umeda can't fall out of love with him (twelve years and counting), but he's not the type of guy to put his entire life/sexual lifestyle on hold because of that. At the same time, he seems reluctant to get too involved with someone horribly in love with him (cough Akiha cough), probably because that brings an intimacy he'd feel incomfortable with while still being in love with Ryoichi. So most of the time, he meets a guy, gets to know him, sleeps with him, and generally lives in 'friends with benefits' lifestyles with folks; some last longer than others, but it all seems very ... everyone's aware it's not a love-love scenario. It's not portrayed as a bad thing, just the way it is. Umeda canonically chats people up for this very intent; when the class is on a fieldtrip, Umeda yells at the boys to stop hitting on girls, they're there for SCHOOL dammit, then immediately turns and goes back to trying to pick up this guy. Later, Mizuki walks in on them -- well, it's foreplay at least, but there's some grinding going on there. Heh.
Anyway, so. Umeda seems to have a vague interest in several people but a distaste from the thought of them falling in love with him, and that stems from this, so it's just an introductionary thing.
And so, for the list of characters he's talked to enough to form an opinion on! Now, Umeda is ... he's a grouch, and a bastard ,and he really likes harassing people, which is all a front for a softie who really likes working with people and getting to know the kids. Well, not ALL a front. He really is a jerk, and likes harassing 'em, but that's in there too. Anyway, this isn't a complete list; some he's interacted with, but not enough to form a real opinion on. So it's the ones who he's interacted with ENOUGH and yeah. I still have to read Great Gatsby tonight, see.
Chizuru - Aww, cute li'l babydyke. Okay, she's not that young, and Umeda probably would only say it to irritate her, but from brief interactions, Umeda's amused by her. Being a lesbian makes her kinda safer to talk to (Umeda says that women "depress him at the best of times"), and on further interactions, Umeda will probably make some kind of undercutting comments about her being a female him.
Alex - Stupid kid. But also pretty messed up in the head. Probably needs years of therapy. Umeda has no patience with Alex and will kick him in the head a lot when he thinks Alex needs it, particularly regarding attempting to stab counsellors, but is kinda fond of the creepy thug anyway.
Yue Ying - Met her in the wrong body. Finds her sort of interesting to talk to, but would rather keep his distance from bossy women in general. (...Less bossy women he can bully. Bossy ones remind him of his sister.)
Lu Xun - Umeda likes Boyan, and not just because he can say things like "Stop talking and start sucking". And also not just because Boyan is EXTREMELY easy to harass and mock, though that helps. Lu Xun seems like a shiny, genuine person with a lot of friendliness to him, and hey, he's maturing into a nice pretty-faced young man. Kinda the type of guy Umeda'd pick up for a night or two if he didn't expect to see him again, but since they're stuck in camp together, he's not really trying it.
Simon Tam - OMG STFU HOR. Yeah, that summarizes it. He sort of WANTS to like Simon; it'd be good to have another doctor he got along with and able to work with, and has occassionally tried to drop hints that if Simon pulled back, Umeda would too. But Simon's personality just rubs him the wrong way all the time. If Simon keeps it up, he can expect to come back to his office to find it wallpapered with half-naked posters of Umeda, and other such biting commentaries. Umeda is of the firm opinion that Simon may be a good surgeon -- and has the credentials to prove it -- but he won't be a good doctor until he gets his head out of his ass and stops trying to compare cock sizes as a general principle of interaction.
Al - Built the hospital. Seems friendly. Is an alchemist. That's about all Umeda knows, but he keeps it in mind.
Izumi Shion - Umeda has blandly agreed that if he ever finds himself in conversation with Izumi, to ask Izumi to stop torturing and/or trying to kill Robert. He knows it'll probably end in his own pain, but what the hell.
Oscar Masao Himejima - Umeda is secretly relieved to have someone here from school who knows him and his style and who he can mock and tease without him ANGSTING over it or anything. In fact, he's positivally delighted, hence immediately showing up to mock Oscar. However, of course, to let on about that would kinda undo his plans, so naw, it's time to be an asshole to the POOR TORMENTED SOUL.
Wolfram - Aww, he's a good kid who is just very stuck in the thought that HIS WAY OF THINKING IS THE RIGHT ONE. Umeda is equally willing to ruffle his hair and kick him in the face, except Wolfram is probably one of those people who would get offended at the first and pissed off and betrayed at the second.
Robert Haydn - Umeda LIKES Robert. At first it was at Mal's suggestion, but Robert seems like a good kid who is very fucked up in the head and probably needs to be treated like a normal person ... which in Umeda's mind means mocking, teasing, and helping them. He fully intends to do crossword puzzles with Robert, where by 'do' I mean 'kibitz horribly'.
Kazahaya - Kid keeps getting hurt. And on the one hand, his sister-trauma-passs-out-from-bloodloss-and-fever thing was kinda disturbing, but on the other hand ,it was exactly the kind of shoujo melodramatics that makes Umeda feel right at home. He kinda likes Kudou and will gladly treat him any time he needs it. Which will probably be a lot.
Kabuto - Hell of a good doctor. And tends to get there first. Umeda's pretty impressed by Kabuto, but something about Kabuto just isn't his type, and he's quite content to leave it professional -- even if Kabuto WEREN'T obviously taken, which sort of strikes him off the list.
Ami - Umeda's barely seen her around and was kinda surprised when she asked to intern for him. He wouldn't mind having an extra set of hands around the place, but he was being honest when he pointed out that Ryuuken would have better credentials for her and would look better on a resume.He also kinda likes to be able to slack off and take naps when nobody needs anything immediately.
Hakkai -Hi playercest On the one hand, Hakkai is exactly the type Umeda would normally try to pick up -- he likes pretty-faced men, after all. But the near immediate revelation that hakkai was Gojyo's boyfriend and they were exclusive -- this two days after Umeda and Gojyo made out -- had a bit of a souring effect. He plans to avoid Hakkai somewhat after the inital so-called apology which was more of a hand-washing thing; he's got some respect for Hakkai's comment that, basically, he wasn't Gojyo's keeper, but the last thing he wants is the complications that arise from butting into a relationship, especially when both people are apparently headcases with giant incestuous family hangups and tragic backstories. Umeda thinks Hakkai is probably one of those tragic people who act happy because otherwise they have to explain that they think they aren't worth the effort other people expend on being friendly with them. But hey, at least he's friendly. And that dragon's sort of cool.
Soushi - Umeda doesn't really like Soushi as a person, and finds him kinda a troubling patient, but he doesn't dislike him either; he's sort of neutral on him and is still pleased to fix up Soushi whenever he needs it.
Momoko - He's not sure whether or not she really IS that sweet and affectionate or just seems to be. FURTHER INTERACTIONS WILL TELL!
Ryuuken - Hot, but a headcase with child issues. Probably straight too, to judge by the whole 'dead wife' thing.
Minagawa - Cute, but reminds him so much of a grown up version of one of the kids at school (Kayashima) that it's a bit unnerving and a definite turn-off.
Dante - Nice guy, attractive, obviously he'd be taken. But you know? He brings the booze and parties. Umeda gives this guy a big thumb's up.
Il Palazzo - He roped Alex on Umeda's request when Umeda got tired of dealing with him. That makes him a good guy in Umeda's books.
Mal Reynolds - Man, Umeda thinks Mal's great. Despite having very different views on things and very different preferences, things they like, etc, Umeda and Mal get along like they've been friends for years. Maybe it's the way they both have a laid back attitude about things; I'm not sure. But on Umeda's part it's sort of -- Umeda has a weakness to being trusted and treated affectionately. It's a giant weakness that, I'm pretty sure, he acts like a jerk to help hide. It's how Mizuki wins him over almost immediately in the manga; he's a bastard who harasses people, but she confides in him, and because she does, he's always there to listen and helps behind the scenes where he can. In a similar way, about the time Mal gave Umeda the trust to take care of Robert (and Ueki, IIRC, but mostly Robert), Mal won Umeda over entirely. Of course, Umeda immediately tried to act like a jerk to hide that impulse, but Mal just kept on at it and Umeda settled down. Right now, Mal's probably the person Umeda's closest to in camp.
Roy Mustang - Oh Hay, that Military Guy Sure Is Cute. His face is almost not cute enough for Umeda to have an immediate visceral reaction to, but something about the way he carries himself and his occasional dorky expressions helps overcome it.Umeda would do Roy in a Central City minute. They haven't talked much, but Umeda is resolved to change that sometime.
Lupin - Umeda kinda likes Lupin. He's laid back, funny, and here to have fun. He's totally not Umeda's type in any way, shape, or form, but he's pretty cool.
Snaaaaaaaaaaaaake - Okay, so, Umeda and Snake have talked once. He's not bad, kind of laid back, but Umeda is starting to wonder where Snake hides; he's almost never visibly about.
Tsunade - Good doctor. Umeda is incredibly intimidated by her cleavage. He's probably had a nightmare or two about it. But a damn good doctor, and he kinda appreciates her as a person too. He would deny it up and down if ever asked, though.
Leon - Umeda, again, doesn't exactly want to show that he cares, but he's starting to get ... really sort of worried about Leon's absence. He likes Leon; he thinks Leon's hot, and fun to be around, and easy to mock but doesn't get uptight about being mocked, and okay, Leon's a bit of a cocktease, but hey, Umeda's since learned they can't have sex at camp anyway. More to the point, Leon seemed to have the same view of these things as Umeda did, and is a generally friendly guy who Umeda was really very fond of. And Leon's, well, he goes out and shoots things, and he hasn't been seen for nearly a month. Umeda figures he can take care of himself, but is nevertheless a little concerned.
Sha Gojyo - Oh god. Uh. XD Umeda liiiiiiiikes Gojyo. Gojyo's able to be mocked, and friendly, and likes a lot of the same things Umeda does; they've got a pretty similar life outlook, just towards differnet genders. And things were going swimmingly, with the bonding over bodily fluids (Umeda thought this was HILARIOUS. After coming off the painkillers, Gojyo probably wanted to shoot himself, but Umeda thought it was HILARIOUS), and the drinking and smoking together and a general chance to just hang out and be guys. And more than swimmingly, hey, Gojyo kissed him and damn but they enjoyed it. In fact, had there not been rules (and Mal around to remind/tell them about that), there would have been sex then and there. Both of 'em knew it.And seriously, Gojyo would have bottomed.
And then, uh, Umeda got kinda pissed at Gojyo two days later when it turned out, HAY FALSE CALL, BOYFRIEND HE'S DEVOTED TO. See, Umeda wouldn't have minded flirting with Gojyo or things going as they had been if Gojyo had told him about the boyfriend in advance, or otherwise just made it clear he couldn't. But it partly comes down to the trust thing again -- hard to trust someone who hid a kind of important detail like that -- and partly that Umeda feels he's been tricked in order for Gojyo to get what he wanted without having to be responsible to his lover; "hey, there was alcohol, the doc kept flirting with me, it's not my fault" sort of thing. Moreover, he feels it's a pretty dirty trick to try to get him involved in a cuckolding-type situation without even letting him know in advance and he's pretty irritable about Gojyo right now.
That said, he still finds Gojyo attractive, and he and Gojyo still have personalities very compatable to a friendship, so they'll probably be friends again soon enough, if perhaps with a sharper, more bitter undercurrent than before for a while. They just need to get drunk and have it out, and hopefully (?) not make out again .
...Also, Kenren looks one hell of a lot like Ryoichi, so I really hope a past life thing happens at some point for those guys. |D AND SOMEDAY LET ME TELL YOU MY AND![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
eoan's THEORY ABOUT CROSS-FANDOM REINCARNATIONS, because Umeda totally acts like another Kenren/Gojyo incarnation in some ways. Er. OFF TOPIC. ANYHOW.
Xelloss - Umeda hasn't met him, but has already decided he probably won't like him, 'cause of the whole 'removing Goku's limiter oh hay a lot of people sure got hurt' thing. Though he did make a friend or two out of the deal.
Yanno, I rambled about this before, and will again (I am partly through rereading and keeping a compiled list of every single person Umeda is in some kind of sexual/romantic relationship with but that'll be a while before it's done. Uh.) but Umeda is into casual sex. This is mainly because the guy he's in love with, well, doesn't really like him back. Umeda can't fall out of love with him (twelve years and counting), but he's not the type of guy to put his entire life/sexual lifestyle on hold because of that. At the same time, he seems reluctant to get too involved with someone horribly in love with him (cough Akiha cough), probably because that brings an intimacy he'd feel incomfortable with while still being in love with Ryoichi. So most of the time, he meets a guy, gets to know him, sleeps with him, and generally lives in 'friends with benefits' lifestyles with folks; some last longer than others, but it all seems very ... everyone's aware it's not a love-love scenario. It's not portrayed as a bad thing, just the way it is. Umeda canonically chats people up for this very intent; when the class is on a fieldtrip, Umeda yells at the boys to stop hitting on girls, they're there for SCHOOL dammit, then immediately turns and goes back to trying to pick up this guy. Later, Mizuki walks in on them -- well, it's foreplay at least, but there's some grinding going on there. Heh.
Anyway, so. Umeda seems to have a vague interest in several people but a distaste from the thought of them falling in love with him, and that stems from this, so it's just an introductionary thing.
And so, for the list of characters he's talked to enough to form an opinion on! Now, Umeda is ... he's a grouch, and a bastard ,and he really likes harassing people, which is all a front for a softie who really likes working with people and getting to know the kids. Well, not ALL a front. He really is a jerk, and likes harassing 'em, but that's in there too. Anyway, this isn't a complete list; some he's interacted with, but not enough to form a real opinion on. So it's the ones who he's interacted with ENOUGH and yeah. I still have to read Great Gatsby tonight, see.
Chizuru - Aww, cute li'l babydyke. Okay, she's not that young, and Umeda probably would only say it to irritate her, but from brief interactions, Umeda's amused by her. Being a lesbian makes her kinda safer to talk to (Umeda says that women "depress him at the best of times"), and on further interactions, Umeda will probably make some kind of undercutting comments about her being a female him.
Alex - Stupid kid. But also pretty messed up in the head. Probably needs years of therapy. Umeda has no patience with Alex and will kick him in the head a lot when he thinks Alex needs it, particularly regarding attempting to stab counsellors, but is kinda fond of the creepy thug anyway.
Yue Ying - Met her in the wrong body. Finds her sort of interesting to talk to, but would rather keep his distance from bossy women in general. (...Less bossy women he can bully. Bossy ones remind him of his sister.)
Lu Xun - Umeda likes Boyan, and not just because he can say things like "Stop talking and start sucking". And also not just because Boyan is EXTREMELY easy to harass and mock, though that helps. Lu Xun seems like a shiny, genuine person with a lot of friendliness to him, and hey, he's maturing into a nice pretty-faced young man. Kinda the type of guy Umeda'd pick up for a night or two if he didn't expect to see him again, but since they're stuck in camp together, he's not really trying it.
Simon Tam - OMG STFU HOR. Yeah, that summarizes it. He sort of WANTS to like Simon; it'd be good to have another doctor he got along with and able to work with, and has occassionally tried to drop hints that if Simon pulled back, Umeda would too. But Simon's personality just rubs him the wrong way all the time. If Simon keeps it up, he can expect to come back to his office to find it wallpapered with half-naked posters of Umeda, and other such biting commentaries. Umeda is of the firm opinion that Simon may be a good surgeon -- and has the credentials to prove it -- but he won't be a good doctor until he gets his head out of his ass and stops trying to compare cock sizes as a general principle of interaction.
Al - Built the hospital. Seems friendly. Is an alchemist. That's about all Umeda knows, but he keeps it in mind.
Izumi Shion - Umeda has blandly agreed that if he ever finds himself in conversation with Izumi, to ask Izumi to stop torturing and/or trying to kill Robert. He knows it'll probably end in his own pain, but what the hell.
Wolfram - Aww, he's a good kid who is just very stuck in the thought that HIS WAY OF THINKING IS THE RIGHT ONE. Umeda is equally willing to ruffle his hair and kick him in the face, except Wolfram is probably one of those people who would get offended at the first and pissed off and betrayed at the second.
Robert Haydn - Umeda LIKES Robert. At first it was at Mal's suggestion, but Robert seems like a good kid who is very fucked up in the head and probably needs to be treated like a normal person ... which in Umeda's mind means mocking, teasing, and helping them. He fully intends to do crossword puzzles with Robert, where by 'do' I mean 'kibitz horribly'.
Kazahaya - Kid keeps getting hurt. And on the one hand, his sister-trauma-passs-out-from-bloodloss-and-fever thing was kinda disturbing, but on the other hand ,it was exactly the kind of shoujo melodramatics that makes Umeda feel right at home. He kinda likes Kudou and will gladly treat him any time he needs it. Which will probably be a lot.
Kabuto - Hell of a good doctor. And tends to get there first. Umeda's pretty impressed by Kabuto, but something about Kabuto just isn't his type, and he's quite content to leave it professional -- even if Kabuto WEREN'T obviously taken, which sort of strikes him off the list.
Ami - Umeda's barely seen her around and was kinda surprised when she asked to intern for him. He wouldn't mind having an extra set of hands around the place, but he was being honest when he pointed out that Ryuuken would have better credentials for her and would look better on a resume.
Hakkai -
Soushi - Umeda doesn't really like Soushi as a person, and finds him kinda a troubling patient, but he doesn't dislike him either; he's sort of neutral on him and is still pleased to fix up Soushi whenever he needs it.
Momoko - He's not sure whether or not she really IS that sweet and affectionate or just seems to be. FURTHER INTERACTIONS WILL TELL!
Ryuuken - Hot, but a headcase with child issues. Probably straight too, to judge by the whole 'dead wife' thing.
Minagawa - Cute, but reminds him so much of a grown up version of one of the kids at school (Kayashima) that it's a bit unnerving and a definite turn-off.
Dante - Nice guy, attractive, obviously he'd be taken. But you know? He brings the booze and parties. Umeda gives this guy a big thumb's up.
Il Palazzo - He roped Alex on Umeda's request when Umeda got tired of dealing with him. That makes him a good guy in Umeda's books.
Mal Reynolds - Man, Umeda thinks Mal's great. Despite having very different views on things and very different preferences, things they like, etc, Umeda and Mal get along like they've been friends for years. Maybe it's the way they both have a laid back attitude about things; I'm not sure. But on Umeda's part it's sort of -- Umeda has a weakness to being trusted and treated affectionately. It's a giant weakness that, I'm pretty sure, he acts like a jerk to help hide. It's how Mizuki wins him over almost immediately in the manga; he's a bastard who harasses people, but she confides in him, and because she does, he's always there to listen and helps behind the scenes where he can. In a similar way, about the time Mal gave Umeda the trust to take care of Robert (and Ueki, IIRC, but mostly Robert), Mal won Umeda over entirely. Of course, Umeda immediately tried to act like a jerk to hide that impulse, but Mal just kept on at it and Umeda settled down. Right now, Mal's probably the person Umeda's closest to in camp.
Roy Mustang - Oh Hay, that Military Guy Sure Is Cute. His face is almost not cute enough for Umeda to have an immediate visceral reaction to, but something about the way he carries himself and his occasional dorky expressions helps overcome it.
Lupin - Umeda kinda likes Lupin. He's laid back, funny, and here to have fun. He's totally not Umeda's type in any way, shape, or form, but he's pretty cool.
Snaaaaaaaaaaaaake - Okay, so, Umeda and Snake have talked once. He's not bad, kind of laid back, but Umeda is starting to wonder where Snake hides; he's almost never visibly about.
Tsunade - Good doctor. Umeda is incredibly intimidated by her cleavage. He's probably had a nightmare or two about it. But a damn good doctor, and he kinda appreciates her as a person too. He would deny it up and down if ever asked, though.
Leon - Umeda, again, doesn't exactly want to show that he cares, but he's starting to get ... really sort of worried about Leon's absence. He likes Leon; he thinks Leon's hot, and fun to be around, and easy to mock but doesn't get uptight about being mocked, and okay, Leon's a bit of a cocktease, but hey, Umeda's since learned they can't have sex at camp anyway. More to the point, Leon seemed to have the same view of these things as Umeda did, and is a generally friendly guy who Umeda was really very fond of. And Leon's, well, he goes out and shoots things, and he hasn't been seen for nearly a month. Umeda figures he can take care of himself, but is nevertheless a little concerned.
Sha Gojyo - Oh god. Uh. XD Umeda liiiiiiiikes Gojyo. Gojyo's able to be mocked, and friendly, and likes a lot of the same things Umeda does; they've got a pretty similar life outlook, just towards differnet genders. And things were going swimmingly, with the bonding over bodily fluids (Umeda thought this was HILARIOUS. After coming off the painkillers, Gojyo probably wanted to shoot himself, but Umeda thought it was HILARIOUS), and the drinking and smoking together and a general chance to just hang out and be guys. And more than swimmingly, hey, Gojyo kissed him and damn but they enjoyed it. In fact, had there not been rules (and Mal around to remind/tell them about that), there would have been sex then and there. Both of 'em knew it.
And then, uh, Umeda got kinda pissed at Gojyo two days later when it turned out, HAY FALSE CALL, BOYFRIEND HE'S DEVOTED TO. See, Umeda wouldn't have minded flirting with Gojyo or things going as they had been if Gojyo had told him about the boyfriend in advance, or otherwise just made it clear he couldn't. But it partly comes down to the trust thing again -- hard to trust someone who hid a kind of important detail like that -- and partly that Umeda feels he's been tricked in order for Gojyo to get what he wanted without having to be responsible to his lover; "hey, there was alcohol, the doc kept flirting with me, it's not my fault" sort of thing. Moreover, he feels it's a pretty dirty trick to try to get him involved in a cuckolding-type situation without even letting him know in advance and he's pretty irritable about Gojyo right now.
That said, he still finds Gojyo attractive, and he and Gojyo still have personalities very compatable to a friendship, so they'll probably be friends again soon enough, if perhaps with a sharper, more bitter undercurrent than before for a while. They just need to get drunk and have it out, and hopefully (?) not make out again .
...Also, Kenren looks one hell of a lot like Ryoichi, so I really hope a past life thing happens at some point for those guys. |D AND SOMEDAY LET ME TELL YOU MY AND
eoan's THEORY ABOUT CROSS-FANDOM REINCARNATIONS, because Umeda totally acts like another Kenren/Gojyo incarnation in some ways. Er. OFF TOPIC. ANYHOW.Xelloss - Umeda hasn't met him, but has already decided he probably won't like him, 'cause of the whole 'removing Goku's limiter oh hay a lot of people sure got hurt' thing. Though he did make a friend or two out of the deal.
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Also, Alex kinda likes Umeda in a strange "WTFthisguyannoysme" way.
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...he wore that for halloween too. |D I love my canon.
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That just.. breaks your brain, doesn't it?
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AHAHAH I WAS PLANNING TO WRITE A HAKKAI/GOJYO ESSAY THING TOO. But it's okay, really, I have relationship lists to work on and I'm sure you'll cover everything that needs to be covered on those two. GOD I'M NOT MAKING ANY SENSE, AM I? I blame on the fever yeah.
Also. GOJYO LOVES YOU HONEY. I'm going to have to write an essay on Gojyo and his issues, anyway.
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HAY BABY YOU SURE AS HELL *BETTER* WRITE A HAKKAI/GOJYO ESSAY THING TOO. YOU THINK THE WORLD CAN HAVE TOO MANY HAKKAI/GOJYO ESSAY THINGS? WRITE THE HAKKAI GOJYO ESSAY THING er I mean. Please. ♥ How's the fever doing?
AWW SWEETHEART. I POSTED A PICTURE OF MY ASS ON THE COMM TODAY.
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